Why isn’t there a store (other than Walmart) that sells dresses for newborns? Seriously. I can’t find anything smaller than 12 months. Belk has a few dresses, but they’re ugly. JCPenney doesn’t have any. Neither does K-Mart. I can’t find an Easter dress for Emily anywhere!
What is up with Oprah’s hair today? I normally never watch her show, but I tuned in today to see a blogger whom I stalk, and I must say, that hairdo is making her face look fat. And it’s really just boring and unflattering and flat.
Have the citizens of Bulloch County never seen a woman wear her baby before? I went to the mall today and put Emily in the sling (by the way, thanks Kelli!) and you would have thought that I had an arm growing out of my forehead. People were staring everywhere I looked, and a group of women even stopped me and asked about it. They had never seen anything like it. Which rock have they been hiding under?
How did The Ting Tings’ song “That’s Not My Name” ever make it on to the radio? Really, who wrote that song? Who decided that it should be recorded? Who allowed it to be released? And who would listen to it?
Why do men who are in the military wear their uniforms in their weddings? Is it because they have to, or do they just want to? It’s kind of strange in my opinion. The Orkin men don’t wear their uniforms when they get married. Nor do chefs, or doctors, or firemen. When and why did this tradition start?
Shouldn’t the “Expecting Mothers” parking spaces be changed to “Expectant and New Mothers” parking spaces? Did the person who had that bright idea ever lug a baby carrier into the store? Much heavier than carrying that belly around.
How do telemarketing companies stay in business? I don’t know anybody who has ever listened to more than 3 seconds of the crap, so how do they make any money?
Why is it that you can buy a brand new Kia for $9995, but a brand new Chevrolet will set you back twice that much? (Um, Chevrolet, you might want to start sending in spies and taking notes, because I am almost positive that Kia is not going bankrupt.) Greed gets you nowhere. Here is an idea: instead of making thousands of dollars off of each (few and far between) sale, maybe you should make prices so low that people can’t possibly resist buying a new car, even if it means you only get a $10 profit from each one. Hey, $10 is better than $0, right?
If there is a shortage of teachers, why on earth haven’t I received any calls yet? Hello, I’m a teacher!
I think I should get back into photography. I’m pretty good, right? Do you have any idea how much photographers (have the opportunity to) make? Get to posing Emily, mama’s getting the camera out! Oh, wait, I need a super awesome camera first.